PS I'm Blogging About This: 7 Things That Happen Too Often

PS I'm Writing About This is a column that will highlight some of the colorful conversations I have with friends, strangers and inanimate objects in my daily life...

I spent my winter break how any average female in her early twenties should, lounging on the couch watching basic cable television with my mom. Correction, I was lounging, my mother was busy judging me for spending another day in leggings and probably warming up some tortillas. On one of these ordinary days we were waiting to hear the verdict on a court case, it was a real edge of your seat situation.

It was some neighbor dispute that lead to someone vandalizing something, the usual. Right before the decision was announced the television decided to start screaming bloody murder, followed by some words sliding across the screen. And in that moment my mom flew into a rage. 

Apparently this happens "all the time," even though I explained to her the message specifically said it was a weekly announcement. My mom being completely uninterested in what I had to say continued to rant about once a week being too often and that she wished it would just go away. While she continued to be over dramatic about a weekly PSA taking too much of her time, I began to tune her out and got to thinking about other things that happen way too often. 

Below is my list of things that need to get their act together and think about taking a day off.

» Public Service Announcements. I don’t know exactly what they are announcing but they are doing no one a favor by interrupting our favorite shows with that loud buzzing sound. (We never did find out if the neighbor had to pay for the damage.)

» Periods. I’m not having sex often enough to need a monthly reminder that my womb is empty. My empty bed is reminder enough.

» Low battery. How do we have phone that have touchscreens, mini projectors, work virtually everywhere but can't have a battery life that lasts longer than 15 hours. Priorities people!

» Birth control. Taking birth control on a daily basis (when you're not having sex) is a lot like stocking up on nonperishable food in case of an apocalypse. Expensive and unnecessary. Plus, either scenario, our life is over. 

» Midterms. 'Mid' means middle, meaning there should only be one midterm per course. Is there some second meaning I and Google are unaware of because most professors love midterms, so much that they have 2-3 per semester. Change the name or change the syllabus! 

» Crushes. I wish I could just turn off my emotions, or at least dial them down a notch. "My name is Rubi, and I am emotionally slutty." I have someone new on my mind about as often as those public service announcements my mom hates, but in my defense, all these relationships I'm juggling are purely in my mind. 

» Name changes. If you are one of those users on Instagram, Twitter or god forbid Facebook that changes their name about as often as you post....stop. Nobody cares what your user name is enough for you to change it that often. Plus it makes it very difficult to tag you in a photo when we have to figure out what your name of the week is. 

If you have anything that happens more often than necessary you can leave it in a comment below. That or the link to a cute cat gif, either one. You can never have too many cats gifs.